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Tuesday, December 11, 2018

My Fourteen Rules Of Writing


 

By Kristy McCaffrey

Many an author has posted such a list, and there’s much good info out there if seeking guidance in the writing arena. I’ve been at this inscribing thing now for nearly twenty years (more like forty if you consider my childhood scribbles—yes, they do count), so it goes without saying that I’ve learned a few things along the way.

Here they are.

—Watch ‘Romancing the Stone’, a wonderful movie about romance author Joan Wilder. It’s incredibly accurate, right down to the sticky notes all over her kitchen reminding her she needs to do this and that. When writing, we writers forget everything.

—I’ve given up trying to write before I’ve checked email, blogs, Facebook, Twitter, and Pinterest. I write in the afternoons and evenings, which pretty much ruins dinner every night.


—Get an iPod to block out the kids and husband. I make playlists for each story, offering me one more avenue to procrastinate on my writing. (Never mind that no one uses iPods anymore. I will never give mine up.)

—Buy bookshelves to hold research books but know that it won’t matter. You’ll still run out of room, so make peace with tomes strewn all over the floor.


—When I’m stuck on a scene, I’ve found the most effective method is to stop writing and wait for inspiration. Three days later when nothing hits, I return to the computer pissed off and write a scene in frustrated anger. But, hey, I’ve finally moved forward.

—I rewrite any sentence that contains ‘lie’ or ‘lay’ because I’m unable to remember the rule and too lazy to look it up.


—I always keep a thesaurus and dictionary handy. My trade is words, and my work is to make ’em count. (By the way, this doesn’t count for ‘lie’ or ‘lay’—a loathsome trickery in the English language.)

—Don’t name an animal after a color. If you decide to change the name later, a ‘search and replace’ in Word will make you realize how many times you used the word ‘white’ within your manuscript (because it will replace all the wrong ‘whites’). Now, it becomes apparent that the thesaurus has been neglected.

—I refuse to feel guilt when I use an adverb.

—I have a tendency to put spectacles on my heroines in every first draft, which I must later delete. It’s the oldest trick in the book to make my ladies appear ‘smart’. Did I mention that I wear glasses?

—I’ve learned to trust my muse. She’s a sneaky little devil, never making things clear until the end of a project. By then I’ve eaten too much ice cream and moped around believing I’ll NEVER make this story work.

—I’m a writer, not a brain surgeon or a rocket scientist, and therefore there’s no sense dwelling on bad prose (mine or anyone else’s). Move on. I can always do better next time. (This is my pep talk after bouts of insecurity and lots of ice cream.)


—I obsess constantly about where to put commas, which has led to more than one restless night. I will edit year-old blog posts if I realize I missed a critical comma. And no, I'm not obsessive-compulsive, hyper-focused, or anal. (I will probably re-edit this post next year...)

—I keep writing until the heart of a story can be excavated. It always exists, and it’s my job to clear the dirt and debris so that it can shine. I’m simply a translator of myth and symbolism into something others can enjoy. It’s my gift, and my curse. I imagine brain surgeons feel the same way.

So, to recap. Writing is exhilarating, but also crappy. (I can't find ‘crappy’ in my thesaurus, so have no other word to use. Sorry.)


Since it’s December and the season of giving, I want to send one lucky commenter an autographed print copy of INTO THE LAND OF SHADOWS, a standalone historical western romance with humor and paranormal elements. It’s also a little on the steamy side. If you would like to be entered, please include your email address in the comments so that I don’t have to crawl the web to find you. Unfortunately, the print copy is for U.S. addresses only. If you’re international, the prize will be digital. Winner chosen on December 14, 2018.


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Wishing you all a blessed and bright 2019!!



22 comments:

  1. Love the post, Kirsty. It made me smile and gave me a boost as I've been trying to work out a problem in my WIP. By the way, loved INTO THE LAND OF SHADOWS. Just finished reading it for the second time. Thanks for the post.

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    1. Aww, thanks Agnes! So glad you enjoy the story. Happy Holidays to you and yours.

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  2. Sorry I spelled your name wrong. I'm dyslectic and the problem often kicks in and makes me transpose letters.

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  3. Great post, Kristy! Writing is a messy process and it's helpful to know we're not the only ones feeling like we're sitting in the middle of bits left over from a garage sale and trying to make sense of it all. I had to laugh because I also avoid using sentences with lie or lay. I also long for the day I write "weird" right the first time. And Ipod, yes! My daughter was home recently and tried to throw away my Ipod charger saying "who uses these anymore?" I was like that slow motion person leaping across the room yelling "Noooo" in a weird/wierd voice. And Agnes, I'm also dyslexic and it makes life interesting at times if not downright weird/wierd.

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    1. Haha, love the visuals. My kids have tried to take away my iPod too. I become a she-cat when they try. Happy Holidays!

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  4. Great post, and one I can really relate to. Now you made me wonder if that comma is in the right place, lol! Merry Christmas.

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    1. I hope I'm not too strange in that I ruminate over comma placement, and I still get it wrong. Happy Holidays!

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  5. Love the post and I live in the US would love to win a print copy Thank you so much for the chance! SARAHTAYLOR601973atyahoodotcom

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  6. Kristy,

    We must be writing twins at heart. My writing life/schedule mirrors yours. I laughed at the iPod usage (you and Patti). I've never owned an iPod. I still use a battery-operated Cassette AND CD Walkman. lol Probably if the 8-track tapes had been portable, that's what I'd still be using. I love the Steven Wright quote. He's so funny with his deadpan, one-liner delivery.

    I've got the comma issue under control, but I invariably have to look up the correct usage of lie/lay to remember which one has a direct object (You'll notice I avoided specifying which one...).

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    1. I still have my walkman although I don't use it. I figure I can gift it to a museum one day lol. 8-tracks! Oh gosh. I remember my parents playing those in the car. Happy Holidays!!

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  7. I would love to win a copy of Into the Land of Shadows, thanks for the giveaway! lclee59(at)centurylink(dot)net

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  8. I love these "rules" because there's always room given to break them! haha! Or change them as you need them changed.

    I have an ipod touch and I refuse to give it up too! lol And I love playlists!! I typically put them on spotify so that if it's a book one, others can hear it too. (so now, nosey me wants to see some of your playlists.)

    Oh, and commas always get messed up because those rules are fluid and meant to be broken and your editor is gonna change them all up anyways! lol (ahem) ;)

    I have the ebook of this, but not a print, and I haven't read it yet, so.... I'm game for a chance! jammreed at gmail


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    1. Playlists for my books are very important. It's one reason I'm loath to abandon my iPod. I've spent hours and hours creating them. I have a great love of '70s music, so my 'writing' collections are filled with songs from that era. Happy Holidays and I've got you entered!

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  9. I loved this blog and all the delightful--and very true quotes you added. My favorite quote was how sometimes people need a story more than they need food.
    As for post-it notes--I have had times when my desk was littered with the critters with everything from appointments to notes regarding my WIP and what I needed to change or include.
    If there is a mistake to be made, I've made it. The more I write, the better I get. Most of all, I have been blessed with help and encouragement from my writer friends.
    You blog was such a delight to read, Kristy.
    I wish you a fabulous and memorable Christmas.

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    1. Thank you, Sarah! I, too, am a post-it note queen. Happy Holidays, sweet lady. :-)

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  10. I appreciate my Author's more now than ever for all your hard work. Great, hard work.

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    1. Hello Unknown -- I'll need your email in order for you to be entered into the drawing, otherwise I'll have no way to contact you in case you win. Thanks!

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  11. You all work so hard for us readers. I am very greatful for all my Author's. Thank you for all you do.

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  12. The winner of my giveaway is Connie Lee!! Congrats!! I'll contact you for your address.

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